A man who has strayed?
In my case, my man strayed and it was with someone who had many common friends with me. At times, I ask myself if he did it on purpose. He jolly well knew that sooner or later, someone is gonna confront me with the photographs of them being together. So why did he do it? All he can tell me is that he don't know.
I know in my heart that I can never forgive someone who strayed. The scene replays itself in my head. I question myself why was I so stupid to have married him? I should never have married him in the first place. Why did I give myself such a burden? I should have heed my mother's words and just have the baby without marrying him. Now that I am regretting, what can I do?
He says that he regrets it and wants to make it up to us but I don't see it as so. He is still pretty much the same, I don't think things have changed much.
Why am I not leaving him now? Because there is no one to help me take care of Larissa at my mom's place. I am waiting, for the day Larissa turns 18 months and I will be able to enroll her in a childcare center. Then, I will see and decide if a divorce is the best for us.
8 comments:
Are you angrier that he's strayed or that he's strayed with someone with whom you've got common friends?
I'm sorry to say that waiting till your daughter's 18mths will not help things. It may be even more difficult as she will become more attached to her daddy (Should you choose to leave him).
I've a friend whose husband had an affair and an illegitimate child, but she can't leave him cos her kids will keep asking for him and throwing tantrums if he's not around...
I am angry with both the fact he stray and that it is with someone whom we've got common friends. I have to wait till my girl turns 18 months so that I can put her in childcare. The situation back at my mom's place is not ideal for her to move back. My mom is working and no one is home to look after her.
You can put her in infantcare if you really need to. Cos at 18mths, she can call, talk ...it will be harder for her.
If not, since your hubby says he will change...maybe you can try going for counselling first before you make any decisions before your girl turns 18mths.
Hope it all turns out ok for you. No one deserves to be treated like that!
Actually, it won't be hard because I know Larissa will not miss her daddy. She even refuses to let her daddy carry her. Once I place her in childcare, with other kids to play with her, I am quite sure she will easily forget about him. See how pathetic a father he is? Sighs.
hi, i am someone who experience what you are facing now about 2yrs back. from your past entries, i believe everyone have seen how dramatic is your family now. my hubby did the same thing to me 2yrs back, he apologised and i know i really love him so i gave him a chance, i gave him nearly 6mths to allow him to prove to me how much he want this family, and yes he did. i really hope u can set a right mindset, divorcing is just a word to use to threaten him, from your previous maybe 10 entry? i can see the word divorce, leaving him repeatedly. you might want to heed my advice to bring that word out of your mind, give him time and maybe things will go better? no matter how he is the still the father of your child, there are bound to be some attachment between them. think wisely before you make any decision. set your mindset right.
I gave him a chance when I left him and went back but he did not seem to treasure it and he still contacted the woman. I think it shows how much he treasured me and his daughter. The one who came to beg me to stay was his parents, not him.
I am giving us some time now to see where all this will head. A lack of trust is like poison to a relationship and will ruin whatever we have in place. I don't know how am I ever gonna trust a man like that again.
i agreed with your statement, "A lack of trust is like poison to a relationship and will ruin whatever we have in place. " but i do want to tell you "Trust can be gained again if you put your heart and effort to believe."
its really a serious offence for husband to commit this kind of mistake. but i always believe it takes two hand to clap. you might want to reconsider this marriage or reflect on yourself as well. divorcing is definitely not a way out for you and your child. and before i forget one more thing very crucial, are u sure you will be able to cope financially stable without your husband and give your daughter a comfortable life? i understand what you are going through because i went through it myself and i am lucky enough to come out of it and have a happy family now together with my hubby and two daughter. think of the best solution to solve this problem. hopefully things will go smoothly for you!
i was so shocked that u and i actually in the same shoes. however i hv yet to decide whether to divorce or not. Besides we are separated for 6 mths but i actually went overboard n crazy to harass him for months but now i tink i need to stop harassing him for answers.. all he said is he dun know plus he admitted he is a liar. Yet while i n he take a break, he is still seeing the other woman.. very disheartening to hear him saying he still lv me n son but show no actions,. he rather run away n bury himself in work n in jennifer bosom.. i am still hurting n nursing my wounds. so much shattered and broken pieces to pick up one by one.
I dunno how to be strong like u and pick up n file for divorce.
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