Not flying after all!

Thank goodness, I don't need to fly!!

All alone to Philippines...

Not that I fear flying, I fear failing at my job.

I could lose my rice bowl ya know...

I think my CEO is crazy...

He is thinking of posting me to the Philippines to close an account!

Alone!! I've got to go alone. I can't believe it...

Come on, I've just started this job for barely 3 months, I haven't had the chance to sell our company's product to local customers yet and there he wants me to go to Philippines alone?!?!

I reckon that he is freaking crazy!

The worse thing is...he expects the account to be closed. Failure is not accepted and my failing to do so may just cause me to be condemned...

I keep my fingers crossed that the rep in Philippines has done his job and did enough to close the account in the Philippines so that I will not have to go...

Promotion??

I can hardly believe it. I'm not even a confirmed staff of the company yet!

Its only coming two months that I've going this company and yet I'm being pushed to take over my manager's position as regional sales manager?

Ok...I was expecting to climb up to that position some day but I was supposed to undergo training for at least one year! Sighs...

My CEO is stressing my manager to move to Australia to take over the business there. My CEO wanted to employ another manager for SEA but my current manager is already the 8th manager (the rest all quit withnin 3 months) and he is the longest staying one.

The truth is, there is just too much crap in Asia. Whoever takes over my manager has got to be able to solve problems and be very quick thinking.

Sighs...Things have been confirmed. My manager will be taking over Australia in January next year and his stuff will be handed over to me. Though he will still be supervising me, I have to really start learning everything fast, very very fast...

Its a major challenge for me....Am I able to take it up?

Gained 6kg in like what...4months?

damnit...i knew it, i just knew it. i was turning into a puddle of oil!

freak it...put on 6kg! how can one put on so much weight so quickly? shit...

why cant the weight drop off just as easily?

there must be a conspiracy somewhere. god must have made a mistake when he created me. that explains why i get fat even when drinking just water.

is he playing a joke on me? damn....must cut down on everything...

no fried or oily stuff. no more bachormee dry...can only take soup. apparently its less fats.

more exercise...have to start thinking of a way to ride to work...damn shit...

Civil Servants with Tattoos

Somthing that i cannot comprehend...why aren't the civil servants in singapore not allowed to have tattoos?

seeing that armies from other countries have got lots of tattoos, that makes me wonder...

have you watched fear factor? the one where the US civil servants competed against each other? what caught my attention was their tattoos.

it makes me realise that singapore is still so conservative in our thinking!

does tattoos make one a worse person? i think not. i once heard that the us sailors put tattoos so that if they died out at sea and their bodies are found, their bodies can be recognised by their tattoos.

if singapore soldiers died at sea, how are they gonna be recognised? i mean, yeah, there is such a thing as dna and all sort of stuff but i think that if my husband was gonna be dead with his face beyond recognition, i would want to see that tattoo of my name on him. its a mental consolation ya know? lets me know that its really him and not just some other dead soldier.

i will want something that i can cling onto...

Handphones and laptops

i love handphone. i love my htc touch. i love all pda phones. haha...

due to my current job, i love all pda phones that allow me to check my mail on the go.

although i am already holding to one, i still have my eyes on the htc touch pro and htc diamond.

i cant stop buying phones. they are the only things that i can bear to splurge on. heeeheee...

speaking of laptops, i want one and i need one now! am thinking of getting the acer aspire one or the msi wind. i want one that is tiny enough for me to carry around and do my work and yes, i am a workaholic.

i can work for 48 hours non stop. yeah i know...bad habits die hard. haha...

The Battle with Fats!

Freak! 70kilos! thats how freaking much i weigh now!

damn...the battle with the demon is gonna start again. the thing about the demon is that i love it. its food lah you tootz. what else can get me so fat?

let me see...what did i have earlier...a old chung kee sardine puff for breakfast and yong doufu for breakfast. is that alot? i don't think so..

then why the hell am i getting so darn fat! all my clothes can't fit anymore!

i'd better start fight the flab. can't imagine how much a change of wardrobe is gonna cost me. i can't afford that!

i need a plan...a weight loss plan, a detox plan and a exercise plan. Shall start cycling to work. no more buses...

New company, new environment and new people

I finally changed my job! The current one pays alot better then the last one. The only down side is that I'll be working all alone with no one to speak to. My only mean of connection to the world is through emails.

One thing that I like about working alone is that there is no one to bother me. I can do things at my own speed and my manager won't even bother me. He's a pretty nice guy who will do everything himself and in a way, it leaves me with pretty much nothing to do.

I do hate having to get up so early in the morning though...Here, work starts at 8.45am which is like 45mins earlier than my previous job which means I have to get up really early. Actually...I've been late at least 15 mins everyday for the past one week or so. haha...

My manager told me, "come here, learn things, get the experience and then you can scoot to higher positions elsewhere!"

Great advice huh? lol...

My Lovely Lola

Okay, its been some time since I bothered to update my blog. Been pretty busy taking care of Lola. She's all grown up now! Here's some beautiful pictures of her...

Another boring day is passing...

I gave up on my food blog...okay, I'll admit that I am too lazy to even blog the food that I consume in a day. But I try to make sure that I don't exceed 1200kcals a day. heehee...

By the way, I got a new puppy!! Okay, its not offically mine yet but I do treat her as my own baby. Knowing my sister, I'm waiting for the day that my sister gives up on her and lets me take over. kwakwa...

Her name is Lola, for now, and she's only about a week old. Did you receive the mass sms that says that there's 8 puppies up for adoption? She from that litter of pups! She's a local cross breed and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she doesn't grow to be too big...She black in colour with a patch of white that runs just below her neck. She is still very tiny now and needs to be fed every 2-3hours. Her eyes are still closed and I'm wondering when are they gonna take their first peek at this colourful world. I'm actually secretly hoping that I'll be the first person that she sets her eyes upon and she'll take me as mom. heehee...

A diet blog

I've read somewhere that noting down what one eats can actually help one cut down on the amount of food one eats so I'm gonna start doing it on my blog.

What I had today:-

Breakfast - A big glass of water to help kick start my system. Prawn noodles with a cup of tea & another glass of water.

Lunch - 4 miserable pieces of chwee kuay with no water at all!

Dinner - One sardine puff and a pack of so called "fresh" soya milk.

Try as I might

I know that I'll never be able to let things go completely.

*Sighs*

I guess I'll just have to let things be. Pain is nothing when its all you've ever felt.

I know that there isn't a point in me being sad but I know this is a stage that I must go through. What doesn't kill me will only make me stronger.

I must thank my dear friends who has been standing beside me, help me though this. I know it upsets you guys to see me unhappy but please understanding that I'm grieving.
Grieving for a love that never was.

I will get over it. Though I might never forget, I know that I can forgive. I believe what goes around comes around and I know that he will get his just desserts. Till then, I will have the last laugh.

Sisha night

I went ahead with the sisha night even though I was sick. I missed the gathering so many times thats I had to go!

It was supposed to be a fun filled night but it felt weird. Some of them kept themselves engaged in their own private conversations. I tried to pull them out of it but they seem intent to keep it that way.

I was burning away and it came to a point where I was having problems keeping my focus.

We headed to Zouk after the sisha and something happened which showed me the ugly side of singaporeans. I'm not gonna say more. Lets just say that it ruined my night.

This I Promise You

One of my all time favourite song. It still manages to melt me everytime I listen to it. A promise like a fairytale that every girl dreams of. In reality, I don't believe in promises because when a promise is broken, it hurts twice as bad...

When the visions around you bring tears to your eyes
And all that surround you are secrets and lies
I'll be your strength, I'll give you hope
Keeping your faith when its gone
The one you should call was standing here all along

And I will take you in my arms
And hold you right where you belong
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you
This I promise you

I've loved you forever in lifetimes before
And I promise you never will you hurt anymore
I give you my word
I give you my heart
This is a battle we've won
And with this vow forever has now began

Just close your eyes each loving day
And know this feeling won't go away
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you
This I promise you

Over and over I fall when I hear you call
Without you in my life baby
I just wouldn't be living at all

And I will take you in my arms
And hold you right where you belong
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you
Just close your eyes each loving day
And know this feeling won't go away
Every word I say is true
This I promise you

What am I doing in this world?

I'm making my way home. Exhausted. Tired out by work, life. Tired out by everything thats happening around me.

I start questioning. Is there really a point in living? What am I doing in this world?

I'm so exhausted, worn out by what life has to offer.

I wake up everyday only to put on a brave front, a mask to face this artificial world when I'm actually dying inside. No one knows whats going on behind the smiling mask, the laughter.

If i could just fall into a deep sleep and never have to wake up again. Wouldn't it be such a blissful sleep?

Tiring day..

Had a pretty tiring day at work. So many things that I had to follow up with. Its at times like these that I really wonder if its worth it. I feel so underpaid!

Anyway, had a company dinner held at Kuishin-bo in celebration of my lady boss's birthday. Japanese buffet...when I'm on a diet! I'm glad to say though that I did not gorge myself silly. I managed to practice a bit of self-discipline and only had a bit of everything that looked good!

Surprisingly, my boss didn't mention anything about alcohol today! Its a first! Everytime there's a company dinner, he'd be very eager to bring out the alcohol. Well, I was later told that he's on a diet...

Went to chill out with a couple of facebook friends after dinner. Was made to think that Mr. Bean's served alcohol which they don't and moved on to The Crew Room which is just opposite.

The place felt kinda like Velvet on a Thursday without the dancefloor. Had a bottle of beer when people started leaving and we decided to go to Mr. Bean's.

With only 3 of us left(all facebook friends) we got down to discussing the event I'm holding on friday. I'm actually worried that the turnout will not be good...anyway, we've also decided to be healthy and start a monthly sports event!

My half day leave on friday will see me in Planet Fitness before the event.

One of us is doing a diploma in yoga and we decided to let her practise by teaching us! The plan is to meet up every wednesday at about 7.30pm to do yoga!

Free yoga lessons! Not bad a deal huh? She gets to practise teaching while we get free lessons.

We've also decided to do the sport event next saturday. Activities include wakeboarding, cycling, blading, kayaking and board jumping.

We're out to prove that drinkers can be healthy too!

Oh dear, I can't wait for yoga! Its something that I've always wanted to do! lol..

Sighs...I'm missing Sarah badly..

A blue monday

I'm thinking its because of the wine that I drank last night that I'm having mondya blues.

Knowing that I have to cut down on food and drinking is not very exciting.

Well, can't blame anyone but myself for indulging myself for the past few months. *sighs*

Really not in the mood for work. How I wish I can go for a run or a cycle...

Free Orgasm?!

Anyone needs one of these? haha..

Are men who blog gay?

Yesterday, D came up to me and said, "ya know, I just realised that only gay men blogs."

That statment surprised me and I had to find out why.

"Well, a blog is an online diary and men don't keep diaries!"

haha...Why didn't I ever think of that...

I went home and did a random check on my friends who blog and came upon a surprising discovery..

Most of my guy friends who blog are gay with the exception of a few straight men who are commonly mistaken as gays!

Makes me wonder...why do straight men not blog? I'm pretty sure that like us, they too need to have an outlet to express themselves. Its no wonder they say that men have a shorter lifespan. I would too if I had to keep everything bottled up.

A normal asian man for example. Goes to work, interacts with colleagues but doesn't reveal too much about his problems, in case he is seen as weak or even unmanly. After work, hangs out with his mates or his girlfriend but still, the male ego doesn't allow him to pour out his problems to his mates or girlfriend. Girlfriend is then left wondering why doesn't he tell her anything. Guy goes him to family and he still keeps things to himself so as not to worry the family and finally he goes to bed with a full head of thoughts, worries and troubles.

Damn...if I were to live a live like that, I'd probably be dead by now!

Isn't it tiring for men to have to keep things to themselves all the freaking time?

I see blogging as a good way for people to say the things they want, to rant about work, poor service or just stuff that mean things to them(like myself).

I would be happy if my man blogs. I see it as a window to his thoughts and it gives me the chanceto take a peek at whats going on in his mind. It'll definitely help after a nasty fight. Ya know, during the cold war and stuff....

So D, I'm not gonna name you but don't be ashamed of the fact that you blog. The rest are just not man enough to do it. haha..

Finally the sun is showing its face!

I woke up this morning to rate the sun shine into my eyes.

Hooray! I can keep my promise and bring my best friend's kid out for a swim and fulfill my wanting a workout! Okay...I might not be able to have a proper workout...having to watch over him buy hey, kids are really a handful sometimes..

Okay...its not really bright and sunny...got to be fast and get to the pool quick.

Sharks...if only I can get my best friend to wake up early.