Saturday, June 18, 2011

The Seventh Day

Today marks the seventh day that my grandma has been gone. We Chinese believes that the spirit of the dead will come back to visit their family for the last time before making their way to where they should go.

I just came back from the temple where her tablet is being placed. The monks there will recite prayers everyday for her for 49 days. I miss her terribly and how I wish that she is still with us.

Anyway, after the prayers, I made my way down to Toa Payoh Central to buy soya milk and soya bean curd, I think thats what its called in English. I remember she used to love it when I was young.

We believe that we should place some of their favourite foods on the table for them when they come back for their last visit. We also believe that they will come back in the form of an insect or animal so we are not allowed to kill any living creature on the seventh day.

Hopefully I will be able to see my grandma tonight and let her know that I really miss her. Sighs...I feel like a part of me had dies along with my grandma. She watched me grow up and took care of me when my mom was busy gambling. Because of this, my palate is somewhat similar to that of my grandma's. I remember her cooking green bean soup for me and making dumplings during the dumpling festival. I am the only one in the family who likes to eat the same food as my grandma.

Tonight, I shall wait up and hope that my grandma pays me a visit.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

She's Gone

Barely 2 days after her discharge from the hospital my grandma passed away on Sunday. I was there by her side when she took her last breathe. I was told by my maid that her toenails were turning blue so I felt for her pulse. I called my mom up immediately when I couldn't feel her pulse. She was still breathing though. Minutes later, she took her last breathe....

This Hokkien song tells of how I feel towards my grandma and I cry everytime I listen to it.

Mama, I miss you. Can you please come back? It hurts so much to know that you are no longer with me. Today will be.the last day.and tomorrow you will be cremated. I don't want you to go. You must watch Larissa grow up. Why did you leave me so early??? Mama~~~
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Thursday, June 9, 2011

Everyone Will Move On

After moving home for some time, I learnt that I should not worry for him.

He will learn one day, how to get on with his life. I can already see him moving on with his life, making new friends and taking on new hobbies.

I am also moving forward. Making new friends and focusing on my work.

Isn't it amazing how people can heal so quickly?

No matter what happens, the earth never stops spinning and time never pauses. Whatever it is, we should get on with our lives.

Never allow anyone to stop you in your live. Never live your life with any regrets.
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Saturday, June 4, 2011

Soulmate

At the stage where I'm at, I don't believe that I will ever find my soulmate.
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